Lost
by Ivycat
Summary: Elena's POV during the events after her leaping from the car to escape Damon. Book world.
1. Lost in the Woods

_This is dedicated to Bethy, who had the flu and begged me to "Write a story about my new vampire book." Even though I had never read the book before. But now I have, and Bethy, this is for you, from your oldest cousin_.

Book World "The Return: Nightfall" Takes up after Chapter 26.

**All characters are the property of the author L.J. Smith. I do not own them, or make a profit from this (unless you count a hug profitable…) No copyright infringement is intended.**

It hurt.

I was confused, disoriented, lost… I had read enough books when I was younger to know that in the equation of life those four determining factors usually equaled just one conclusion.

Death.

I paused, my eyes searching for a landmark, but there was none to be found.

I was going in circles, no, I was going in circles inside of circles. I was not aware of the exact amount of time that had elapsed since I had in desperation to escape Damon, jumped from his speeding car, but i knew it was too long, I should have come out of the other side of the Old Wood by now, or come upon the Dunstan's house.

My arm throbbed and pulsated in pain from the make-shift crutch splintering and slowly working wood slivers into the sensitive skin of my under arm.

"_Matt, I must get help for Matt."_

I took a deep breath, and exhaled slowly. I was sure it was all but hopeless; I had been circling in the woods for so long I was loosing hope of finding my way out and returning with help.. But what else was I going to do, sit down and cry?

The pain grew with every step. My foot started to lag behind ever so slowly, as if it was giving up, refusing my demands. The forest started to flicker before my eyes, I felt myself shaking. I was losing blood fast. I was moving slower now, my body was beginning to rebel from the punishing treatment it had been forced to endure.

I started forward, gritting my teeth in determination, picturing Matt's body on the ground, thrown down by Damon like a discarded child's toy.

"_Just one more step, just one more step, just one more step…"_

__I repeated this mantra to myself as I struggled, forcing my body to ignore the crippling pain.

Then I ran into a woody creeper that was shin high. I never saw it.

I did not see it as I was falling.

I did not see it when I made contact with the ground and felt a pain so deep and absolute that I had no breath with which to scream.

It was only when I was on my back, stranded; when my crutch seemed as if it was caught in a malevolent current as it moved away from me, born on the tendrils of creepers,that I saw it, firmly wrapped around two trees as if it desired to trip unwary travelers. It was getting hard to breathe; the creepers were winding around my body, crushing me. I tore at them, dry sobbing, I could feel new pain as I ripped two fingernails off. That was funny; I did not think it was possible to hurt more. The tiny micro-hairs on the greenery made it seem as if I were tangling with a beast that was attempting to strangle me, not a seemingly innocuous plant.

I sent what Power I had left in me to try and send help to Matt. There was not enough left to get help for myself, but it did not matter, it would not be in time anyway… Would Bonnie hear me?

"_Stefan. Stefan. Stefan."_

I was dying, I knew it, but I had been dead before and it was not so bad, maybe …

Still struggling to free myself my fingers twitched uselessly against the creepers.

Darkness closed in on me.

I was hovering in the air, looking down in pity at the crumpled, damaged Elena on the ground.

I saw her gasping, knew that she was suffering, but somehow, I was apart from it, I was light, a gossamer thread on the wind, free. I hovered a moment above the body helplessly, I knew that I could go back down. Being apart was wrong somehow... But I did not want the pain I knew was waiting when I returned.

I lifted my eyes to the sky, but it was not there, it was all wrong somehow. The stars were blurred and distorted, as if I was looking through a drinking glass. It was in that one moment I lost forever the chance to find peace, if peace there was to be had without Stefan.

There was a shouting in the distance, far away. A Voice was calling, pulling at me. I fought it; it was too cruel to make me return. Someone was running to the Elena, kneeling beside her, tearing off the binding creepers, calling to her. I felt sorry for him, he seemed so sad. I felt myself being drawn back, I struggled, but to avail, "The Voice" was pitiless.

In an instant I was back, unwillingly drawn back to the Elena figure on the ground.

I cried.

_I know that a lot of things are not cannon, please point out errors and I will correct them. Love you Bethy, feel better soon! Chapter 2 if you still feel bad and want it!_


	2. Lost to the World

**A.N. _This chapter is Elena's POV after being rescued from the woods by Damon. When she returns to consciousness she is reverting back when she was sent back to earth with the innocence of a child, so part of this will be her view as a child._**

* * *

hurt to breathe, maybe I should stop.

There was something very wrong.

So much pain, in my legs, my arm, my ribs... my head.

"_Matt._

_Bonnie._

_Matt._

_Hurt._

_Damon._

_Pain._

_Not Damon._

_Stefan._

_Matt._

_Help Matt._

_Please._

_Find._

_Matt._

_Need._

_Stefan._

_Sleep…"_

I can't think. Wrong, it is all wrong somehow.

Dark.

My head feels funny, as if I am not in control of my mind, but the pain subsides, ebbing away like the tide. I struggle against it, I would rather the pain than not being in control of my mind.

"_Oh, God, they got to me, whatever is in Damon, whatever possessed him is in me now. "_

I feel arms around me. But I no longer cared. It was too late to care.

As I lay there passive and exhausted, I was aware there were emotions that were not mine vaguely passing through my subconscious.

Anger, no. Fury. But towards whom? Frantic worry. Confusion. All these merged into a kaleidoscope of emotion that twisted in upon itself.

Then came a period of time when it seemed I was in a bed.

I tried to wake up, I had to do something. Something important.

But it was futile, every time I attempted to make my way out of the dark, to return to consciousness, I was pushed back under by an unseen hand.

There was a curtain before my eyes, not in the literal sense, but it was there none the less, it was a barrier I could not penetrate, like part of my brain had been turned off. I was in some way aware of what was going on around me, but like a person paralyzed, was trapped inside myself.

I was paralyzed, maybe that was the answer, but how could that be? I was still aware I was in pain, but it was more like a faded memory of pain. Paralyzed people could not feel, what was this?

I was being lifted, the pain flared up white hot, and then just as suddenly, dissipated, then I felt my head being held up, the hands were soft and kind feeling, but cold.

Something was being poured into my mouth; I could not fight, though it tasted worse than anything I had ever before consumed.

Again and again, I had to drink the liquid, but every time I was close enough to resist the foul concoction the pain would return. Then, just as quickly, I would be back in the darkness of my mind, far away from pain and light.

Blood! I was being given blood.

"_No, must NOT, fight, Elena, fight!"_

No...I was being pulled under again, must... not… Then, ever so quickly, I felt as if I were falling, falling, down, down, down, Ah, I remembered this, This was not the forced, numb paralysis of the mind, but restorative sleep.

I was confused when I first haltingly back to the surface of things. The pain throbbed through my body, I tried to open my eyes, but all at once the shimmering curtain descended over my mind and I was again helpless. Then there was a restful stillness, I saw water, gently rippling water, and I was filled with peace and tranquility. The ripples were calming and I lay there in contentment watching them. I was aware of a tugging on my body, but I was too involved in the ripples to pay much heed to it, then the pain managed to find a way through the imprisonment of the mind, I began to toss my head on the pillow trying to escape from the discomfort. I felt a hand under my head, and something being held to my lips, I sought to evade it, failed, and as I sank back into sleep the knowledge came, that I, Elena Gilbert, had been utterly vanquished at last.

That was a period of time that seemed to last longer than my paralysis.

All at once I awoke and tasted the sweet water on my lips, I drank eagerly, greedily attempting to slake my thirst, but after a few swallows the cup was pulled away. I whimpered pitifully, but nothing came out; I turned my head, which hurt. I could see Damon sitting beside me, holding the cup in his hands. This alarmed me, memories of what had happened in the clearing came back in shattered fragments fragments. I took a deep breath and in an instant Damon was leaning over me.

His eyes were the same as I had always known them to be.

"Wha…"

I could not form out the words with which to say what I was feeling.

I concentrated hard for a moment, looking hard at Damon then clumsily pronounced,

"You are Damon. You are really you, not the other you!"

This pleased me for some reason. But Damon looked at ma and frowned, lines marring that beautiful forehead.

"I now know who turn to in an identity crisis, but I do not need that reassurance now, thank you. How do you feel? Are you in pain?"

He looked at me as a stag in the woods would, poised on the brink of doing something, tensed to spring to action at the slightest provocation.

An image of him holding a boy against a wall flashed before me. Now it was my turn to frown. Damon had hurt him, _Stefan,_ Damon had hurt Stefan. And it was my fault, somehow I was to blame.

Tears came to my eyes and found their way down my face. I sought for words,

"If you were so angry about the coat, why didn't you punish me? I was the one to have hold of it, I would have given it, I did not know it was yours, you should have hurt me"

Damon took a sharp breath as if I had wounded him, though I knew that could not be. Damon was unhurtable.

"Elena, are you alright? What happened out there in the woods?"

I looked at him.

"You happened, Damon."

Now I could feel confusion emanating from him, he looked away and abruptly ran his hand through his hair, then rose from the chair and paced the room.

I looked at the empty cup,

"Please, I am so thirsty, I want water."

This brought his attention back to me immediately. He did not respond to my want, he just walked to a door, inserted a key, and said,

"Storage closet, penlight."

I knew those words, I could see the images the words summoned, but put together it made no sense. But it must be perfectly logical, because he came back and sat beside me as if this were normal. Maybe it was, maybe I was the one not normal. Had this happened before? Had I known this to happen before? Maybe it was a game; if I tried hard I could think of two words too!

All at once I opened my mouth and rather smugly pronounced,

"Jellyfish, black light!"

Judging from his looks I did not do good. Oh, right, I had an extra word! How silly of me. I looked up at him as he sat beside me on the bed. I had two good words! I smiled at him sheepishly; I hoped he was not mad, I would show him I could do better!

I started to say, "kitten, mush," when he gently placed a finger on my lips. He wanted me to not speak. I smiled up at him and nodded, happy I knew what he was wanting.

He held the flashlight up to my face and suddenly light hurt my eyes, I started to turn my head, but before I could do much more than think about it, a hand held my chin firmly in place, I fought against it, but it just hurt the bottom of my face.

"Shh, shh, don't move." The Voice said, soothing me, I was relaxing suddenly, I felt so pleasant,and happy, everything would be fine now Damon was here. Wouldn't it? What was wrong that I could not remember? I felt slightly chilled.

I was very still as the light flickered from one eye to the other.

I could see he was staring into my eyes, looking deep as if he wanted to get to know my soul. I knew a better way that did not hurt the eyes! But, no, I must be very still. I was starting to be aware of being cold to the bone, a deep aching cold.

Then he held up his hand, I looked at him expectantly.

"How many fingers are there? "

Now he was just being silly, I quickly counted, three touching his hand, and two sticking up.

"Five." I was good at this!

He was shaking his head, and his lips made a line.

"I was holding up two, Elana."

Then his hands were in my hair, fingers probing as if looking for something. That felt good. I closed my eyes and leaned into him, I liked that. But switching positions had caused pain to wash over me, I grabbed at my shoulder, but he held my hands prisoner. I looked at his hands again, I was **sure **he had five fingers. I held up his hand for him in my small ones.

"See, I counted, you have five."

He froze, then sat me up on the bed, I felt hurt.

"What is your name?"

"Elena, you know that!"

"Who am I?"

"Damon, Stefan's brother."

He did not like this. I could see his face harden, and grow dark, reflecting the inside dark.

I looked at him sadly.

"I want Stefan, why is he not here with me?"

His eyes flashed fire, and as he was about to reply with words I knew I did not want to hear, I shivered.

I was cold, so cold. The hurt was coming back, every muscle protesting, the shivers that wracked my body only made them worse.

"Stefan left, but I am taking care of you."

"Thirsty, I am so thirsty. Water."

He was not letting me; I could see it in his eyes.

"I will get you some soup; too much water will hurt you."

"But I want it."

Another shiver punctuated my words.

A blanket was tucked around me.

Damon rose to his feet gracefully,

"I will be back with some soup."

He walked away out of the room, just as I was about to say I did not want to be alone, alone was bad.

There was a loud crash and I could feel the wrongness of this place. I covered my ears and screamed, throwing myself to the side to escape. I fell off the bed. The pain made me dizzy.

"ELENA! ELENA! I could hear Damon shouting my name, and then he was in the room, taking in the scene, empty disheveled bed, sheets tangled around me as I struggled to get up, gasping with pain.

So fast I never saw him coming, I was in his arms, being cradled against his chest. Instinctively I snuggled close to his body in an attempt to warm myself, but he was cold. Like stone. I shivered.

"Elena what were you thinking? Why did you get out of bed? " He seemed angry, but I knew he was hiding fear, which was silly, because I could see it.

"Y ,y,you c,can't hid,de what p,p,people see." I stammered between chattering teeth.

He made no reply, but simply lay me back on the bed and put the blankets over me so I would not be cold, this was so silly, I was so cold the blankets were only trapping the cold against me. Damon must have known what I was thinking, because he stood up and turned his back, and then said,

"Utility room, scissors."

Then he shut the door, and then said,

"Bathroom, modern."

He opened the door and I felt panic start to rise in me, as he stepped into the bathroom.

Then I was peaceful, I knew it was alright, and I would be warm, so warm soon, the haze in my mind intensified, numbing the pain completely again.

I heard water running, wisps of steam wafted out of the bathroom and swirled and eddied as Damon walked back into the room with a large towel folded in his hands. He walked up to me and pulled all the blankets down laying the towel over me. I looked at him puzzled, but he did not meet my eyes, I heard the sharp snip of scissors down at the bottom of the bed, and realized he was cutting off my jeans from the bottom up, he repeated the operation on the other side as I lay there quietly wondering. When he was done, he did the same to my shirt, cutting it from neck to waist.

He went back to the bathroom and the water stopped running. He came back and stooped over me, lifting me. My clothes fell off of me leaving me only in my underthings, but he had picked me up so the towel was still there, covering me.

He carried me to the bathroom, and then lowered me into the water, towel still covering. It was boiling. It felt as if it would scald me. I cried out and struggled, but it was useless. I succeeded in nothing more than dislodging the towel over me. It floated and undulated in the water.

"Hot, it's too hot, you are hurting me!"

"No, stop fighting Elena," he exclaimed,

"The water is only eighty degrees. It can't hurt you. I would never do that. It just feels so hot because you are so cold."

He made a desperate grab to retrieve the towel and replace it, made harder by the fact that he was not looking at the water or towel, instead staring up above my head. Why was that I wondered?

I was still feebly trying to fight, thrashing in the tub and soaking Damon, when the warmth came and enveloped me, I could feel what was coming next and fought it, fought with every ounce I had left in me. I realized that Damon was the one responsible for the warmth and haze, I knew some how that something was not right. Trying to tear away the sense obliterating curtain as it descended, I was struggling so hard in my mind I began to get a head-ache. Damon was holding me firmly with one arm around me in the tub, staring off in the distance as if concentrating with all his might. I wondered what he was thinking about, and whether or not I would see Stefan soon when the darkness again claimed me.

**A.N. Yes, Elena has had a relapse into her child-like state in this chapter.** **Damon still has not pieced it together so fears a head injury**.


	3. Lost in time

Damon's POV

A.N._ This chapter might be confusing to those who have not read the books. The dueling dialogues Damon is having are his real feelings and the part of him that is in the possession of Shinishi taking over his mind. Elena had jumped from the car he was driving while he was possessed and had just finished brutally torturing Matt and Elena. Damon is only marginally aware at times that there is something off with himself._

* * *

I rushed to her, calling to her but I could see that she was slipping fast; the breath sounds were halting, and weak. I tore up armfuls of the creepers, roaring in primal fury and it seemed that my exclamation was even more effective than the removal, for suddenly the vines were retreating, snaking across the ground. I gathered her in my arms, stopping breathing as soon as I was assaulted with the sweet heady smell of her blood. I felt my fangs lengthening and closed my mouth firmly, this was not the time and place, anymore blood loss would be fatal, if it were not already.

I monitored her mind and was almost staggered by the amount of pain she was in. _(Hmm…I wonder how much more she could take?) _

Why was I thinking that?!

I swiftly took an iron grip on her mind, directing the pain away, trying to get a feel for her, but there was naught, which was frightening, I had never felt Elena to be a blank before. Her emotions were quick, fiery and intense. I probed deeper, but still nothing. _Merde!_

I ran as fast as I could, but not fast enough to satisfy me, to lessen the keen anxiety I felt for her.

I was afraid; indeed I was petrified to face the thought that I could lose her at any moment.

"_Stupid human frailty…"_ the thought crossed my mind unbidden. Where did that come from? It seemed a distant echo, or was it a memory? I had thought it so many times, but not with the fury and malevolence that I sensed from the words. This was almost as if it were not me, Damon who was thinking this, I certainly wished Elena no harm. Pushing these thoughts from my mind I concentrated on getting to the cabin as soon as was inhumanly possible.

When I arrived I summoned her room and placed her on the bed. I then took a second to analyze her injuries. They were many and daunting.

I hastened to procure the tea that Shinishi that left. I took a sip, taking the time to analyze the ingredients. It tasted harsh and metallic on my tongue, but I could detect nothing that could harm a human. Satisfied that he had been sufficiently frightened by me that he was not attempting to poison Elena I sat her up to assist her drink it.

The drink was foul; it was thick and oily looking and had dried leaves and twigs floating on the top, for all the world looking like the detritus of a stagnating bog. I could have swore the steam made my eyes water.

It was a good thing that Elena was unconscious, persuading her to drink; even with mind control would not have been easy.

I slowly tilted the cup up as it rested against her lips, taking care to not give her too much and have her aspirate it into her lungs. After a second I frowned, I had succeeded in getting her to take it in her mouth, but how to persuade her to swallow was another problem entirely. I set the cup to the side and tried coaxing her but I knew that was not going to work, she was so deep I could not find her. I hesitated a moment then callously pinched her delicate nostrils together with the lightest of pressure. My left hand clenching with a grip that could have turned coal into a diamond.

There was a few seconds of nothing, I waited and waited, she still did not try to draw breath, I was about to let go and start CPR when she opened her mouth and with a gasp and took a deep breath of life giving air, and tea, into her lungs. I wanted to curse, say things I had never before said in front of a lady, I wanted to break things into tiny matchsticks. But I could not; I held Elena as she coughed and coughed in a futile attempt to expel the foreign fluid from her lungs. Aware the whole time of her injuries being exacerbated by the motion. I growled in frustration.

I then attempted to spoon it into her mouth, but it just dribbled out the other side of her mouth and stained the crisp sheets.

It was then when I was about to despair, I got another idea.

Oh, no, this could not be the thing that worked!

Nevertheless, I held the cup up to her lips again and then ever so gently I started to stroke her milk white, tempting throat.

She swallowed.

I gritted my teeth; this was going to be torture. But time after time, I brought the cup to her lips, softly stroking, caressing the beautiful throat. And time after time, she swallowed more of the life sustaining brew.

I was hungry, no, I was parched. I could feel the pulse getting stronger in her body, the tempting blue veins stood out in sharp relief on her neck.

I pressed my lips together firmly.

There was slight flickering from Elena, it was not what I was used to, but it was definitely her. She would try to resist the drink at times, not by any physical motion, she was still too deeply unconscious for that, her fight would be on the subliminal level, but I sent her back into deep sleep.

After she had most of the liquid, I punctured my wrist, holding it firmly to her mouth, this time she almost came to enough to fight, but the pain was too great. I sighed in frustration, if I had not been so preoccupied about not thinking to her throat I would not have had loosened my grip on her mind. I reasserted my grip on her mind, channeling the pain away, so much pain…

She lay against the pillow with my wrist at her mouth, all the while stroking her to encourage her to swallow; it was more awkward than it sounded. Though I could not help the smug satisfaction of having her drinking **my** blood, not Stefan's, to save her.

Then I felt the transition, Elena was sleeping. I took a breath and removed my wrist, carefully wiping her mouth of my blood. Not that it made much of a difference, she was covered in so many scratches that her face looked like a terrain map. Dried blood had trickled down where the branches had scratched her.

I napped and then gave her more tea more times than I can remember.

Then I felt her moving into the lighter sleep that was the precursor to waking. I could not put my finger on it, but there was something different about her. Had her blood always been this tempting? I was feeling a little wild from its call, every once in a while my hands would tremor like an old man's. But it was not just that, Elena herself seemed different, it was almost as if I had known her like this before, but I could not put a finger on it.

I pulled back the sheet from Elena's frail body, assessing her for injuries. It was then I noticed despite the marked improvement in her status, her shoulder was still dislocated.

This infuriated me; I wanted to kick that fox till it was a bloody, pulpy mess. But instead I opted for the more sensible option_._

"_God help me, I am turning into Stefan!"_

I closed my eyes and took a stronger hold of her mind, pushing down as deeply as I dared to allow her to escape from the pain, and then I commenced to relocate her arm. It was not an easy operation for one person, sure I had the strength, I also could rip it off her body if I so wanted, but, I reflected dryly, that would defeat the purpose of everything I had been doing. I took care to pull it out just enough to slip it back into the socket.

Elena was in agony, her head tossing around on the pillow, her eyes open but unseeing. But only for a fraction of a second, for in an instant I reasserted my control over her mind, trying to calm and reassure her. And judging from the peace that was now radiating from her I did not do a bad job. Not that I ever had reason to doubt my powers against a human.

_Love me little,_

_Love me long,_

_Is the burden of my song,_

_Love that is too hot._

_Burneth soon to waste"_

Where in the world was that coming from?

I picked up the last of the tea and lifted her head and shoulders, she did not want to drink, but it went down anyway. I was glad to see the last of that witches brew.

Once more she subsided into deep restful sleep.

It lasted only half an hour, I felt her waking so went to get some cold water. I loosened her mind gradually, then I held the cup of water to her lips, she drank eagerly, she would have drunk the entire thing in one breath, but I pulled it from her.

She opened her eyes, and dew back sharply, her eyes wide with apprehension, but then it faded and she seemed to be confused. I bent over her she made a few attempts to speak, finally coming out with a low whispery

"Wha…" She looked at me with wide open eyes, eyes that were clearer and, well, innocent was the only thing I could think of. Just when I was lost in my thoughts she pronounced very clearly,

"You are Damon. You are really you, not the other you!"

I looked at her in concern, this was not her usual manner of speaking, oh God, her head, she had jumped out on the road. Did that tea cure concussions? I gave a flippant laugh,

"I now know who turn to in an identity crisis, but I do not need that reassurance now, thank you. How do you feel? Are you in pain?"

I scrutinized her closely to see how she would respond. She was still lost in thought, but when she looked up at me her face was so sad and tears were trickling down. I was about to enclose her mind in an iron grip again if I should need to. But instead she looked up at me with a piteously quivering lip,

"If you were so angry about the coat, why didn't you punish me? I was the one to have hold of it, I would have given it, I did not know it was yours, you should have hurt me"

Why was she bringing up `the incident' from the boarding house? That was certainly not on the list of things I would have thought about her wanting to know when she woke up.

I damned Stefan in my mind; it was his fault that she had seen the whole thing!

But I would have expected, fury, rage, disgust from her. But there was none, she really did think I should have punished her. This was wrong, she was not right somehow.

"Elena, are you alright? What happened out there in the woods?" she looked at me again, no, she looked through me, and then simply said;

"You happened, Damon."

I paced around the room, desperately trying to remember what had happened in the woods. Why was she so frightened when she first saw me?

I heard a soft voice entreating me for water. I knew I could not give her more so soon, I would get her some broth in a minute, but first I needed to assess her mental state, I walked over to the closet, inserted the key and got the desired tool. She had a child like look of anticipation as I walked towards the bed; the she bounced on the bed a little and chimed out;

"Jellyfish, black light!"

I looked at her trying to make sense of what she had just said but could not. Alright, I was going to get to the bottom of this. She was looking up at me like a small child about to tell a joke, the words were hovering ready to come out, but I put one finger on her mouth. She smiled and nodded eagerly. I shown the light into her eyes, she tried to resist, but I held her chin firmly while sending out reassurance. This worked. So far so good, nothing abnormal about pupil response, no abrasions on the scalp. So probably not head trauma. However, just to be sure, I held up two fingers.

"How many fingers are there?"

She puzzled over this for a minute, then smiled and said,

"Five!"

This was not right, what could have caused her to so drastically change in her mannerisms? Everything about her was out of kilter.

I asked if she knew her name, she did, but seemed to find the question amusing.

When I asked who I was her reply was instantaneous,  
"Damon, Stefan's brother"

Ah, at last we were back at the heart of the matter, I was playing second fiddle to my younger brother and did not like it.

That was me being understated.

Now if only I could find out what was causing this cognitive glitch? In the back ground I could hear her asking about him, I answered truthfully, for a lie just would not come while dealing with Elena now, besides I had the feeling it would not do much good anyway.

My next plan was to walk out of here with Elena, and see if she returned to normal once we were away from the dark place, but there was a nagging suspicion that I did not yet want to address, what if this was not just about a frail human going into shock, what if she was again reverting to her spirit self?

The thought made me shudder, as I realized why her blood had never seemed so sweet before. Yes, I could feel the danger Elena was in.

I heard her voice, pitiful and tired sounding as she again entreated for water. This was vexing, I wanted to give her some, but knew it could do more harm than good at the moment. I negotiated for some soup, knowing she was thirsty enough to drink it.

Leaving her was a mistake, the fiendish house seemed trying to separate us, for God knows what end, but I was able to get back in time to see Elena on the floor. Great.

I picked her up off of the floor, and while doing that I felt her body wracked with shivers. I gently placed her on the bed as if she might break, then went about the surest way to warm her I knew of. When I held her in my arm she muttered some sort of gibberish about not hiding what is seen. Poor Elena was really out of it. _If she had chosen me none of this would have happened, we could be together somewhere on our island, wait, I did not have one, but I could get one!_ I could only hope that this time would not be a repeat of the fiasco with Bonnie, _but then good luck to them to find this place, I had Elena here all to myself, and could feast upon her, helpless and defenseless as she was, I would become the strongest of the strong, and the mightiest among mighty! All would look on me and fear the Power I wielded!_ This was a heady thought.

As I was snipping the cloth from her shuddering frame I looked at the skin, my mouth began to water as I contemplated feeding from her, sucking her blood into myself, felt her struggle and writhe from the extraordinary pain, for yes, it would be more agonizing for her than a ordinary human.

Then I caught myself with a breath, I had sworn an oath, I could not break it, even if I wanted to. But I did not, I wished above all else to protect the fragile girl in front of me. Once again I was having to wrest my mind away from another's control. I had had just about enough of this, thank you! I put a towel over her and carried her to the water, it was painful for her, as I knew it would be at the very first, but her struggles surprised me, I had not expected such resistance from her, I tried my best to calm her, but I still felt like I had been in a tsunami. I had enough, she was seriously beginning to panic now, I grasped her mind and calmed her, and then as she still fought, I just put her to sleep. _So much less work and I had a very good chance of feeding off of her without her knowledge._ But why had I put her here to begin with? Right, to warm her up, not feed off of her.

I frowned; my thoughts were all jumbled somehow? It was quite irritating to not feel in complete control of your faculties. _There was that fog again in my mind, good thing I was not flying, would not want to crash into a tree with all this fog._

_What was my original intent to do? Was I going to feed off her and have a night of mad, pleasure, making her mine at last? Yes, that was why I was here._

_I opened my senses to her aura and was surprised how similar it was to the last time I saw her like that, she was almost, but not quite as brilliant as that night. Well, I had not seen any floating, so she must be recovering somewhat, that made my necessity to feed from her soon, all the more imperative. I bent down, down, close to the exposed neck with the blood that I could taste in the air, so fine was it._

_Elena stirred, well, she should have just stayed under, because this was going to hurt a lot worse now. Oh, well, I tried to make it easy on her. Just like in the clearing when she disobeyed me and I had her writhing in my torments, if she had listened that would not have been necessary, but, perhaps me feeding off of her while she was so innocent would be a greater agony than I could give in the clearing. Maybe I could inflict far worse on others once I had drunk of her. This was exciting! And wouldn't Damon be raging when he sees what he did at his own hand to the girl. Marvelous!_

* * *

Damon sat by the tub, supporting Elena his eyes unfocused. Then they snapped open and were swirling with darkness. He sprang to his feet, ignoring Elena slipping under the water. Then in an instant, his eyes red, he bent over her in the tub.


End file.
